How can parents protect children from abuse?: National program encourages open communication

BY Debbie Bryce
Of The Idaho State Journal

POCATELLO - Parents need to let their kids know they have the right to say “no” to adults, said Kathy Downes, a counselor with Bright Tomorrows.

Downes' talk Saturday called “Darkness to Light” offered ideas and information aimed at protecting children from sexual abuse.

The two-hour conference was part of the second annual Family Toolbox, sponsored by Family Living Magazine and the Bannock Youth Foundation.

Organizer Heather Kemp said the event offered free educational sessions dealing with discipline, family finances and relieving stress and provided a host of fun activities for kids.

“We want families to come and have some fun and learn something too,” she said.

About 40 adults and 25 children turned out for the one-day event, 30 child care providers, counselors and concerned parents attended the sexual abuse presentation.

Bright Tomorrows, in Pocatello, offers counseling for victims of sexual abuse and works to raise awareness in the community, Downes said.

The national program encourages care providers and parents to empower children, trust their own gut instincts and keep communication open.

The program emphasized that one big “sex talk” is not enough and encouraged parents to use moments that might be uncomfortable as learning opportunities.

“If you come in and catch your kids playing doctors, scream if you have to, but take the learning opportunity,” Downes said.

Child counselors and childcare centers should have policies in place that limit an adult's one-on-one contact with children. Downes said open door policies let kids know they are safe.

The policies not only protect children, they protect the child care provider, she said.

Torey Portrie, a counselor with Advanced Learning Association, Pocatello, said she tapes most of her sessions.

“I tell parents you have no reason to trust me just because I'm your child's counselor,” she said.

Downes said taking a proactive approach to sexual abuse lets potential perpetrators know they are being watched.

Brooke Golightly, a childcare provider with Children's Supportive Services, a Medicaid funded center in Pocatello, said the presentation raised her awareness about limiting the opportunity for potential sexual abuse.

“I'll be a little more cautious, not paranoid, but cautious,” she said.

Debbie Bryce is the regional reporter for the Journal.

This document was originally published online on Sunday, February 26, 2006